Alice’s Fitness Routine

Please note: This routine provides great techniques for slow weight loss, sometimes weight gain and exercise which ensures you don’t endure any pain, what-so-ever.

The arms

This is mainly used within a public house environment or around the dinner table. Ensure that when eating, you take a tight grip of your cutlery, and get ready to flex. Whilst eating your dinner, the calories are just burning away and your arms are so tight, they will make Ollie Murs pants look loose. Same process at the pub. It’s best to use the same arm for the whole drink and when moving onto the next pint or what not, to change arms.

The legs

This one is a tad easier. It’s called the fridge walk. Pretty self explanatory. When feeling hungry, stand and walk to the fridge, when the food has been chosen, turn around and walk back to your destination. Sometimes, depending on how hungry you are, you may run to the fridge. It could also be the case that there is only one cream bun left, in this case, stretch before performing this exercise as an injury could occur depending on the speed at which you run. Although always remember that fridge pickers wear big knickers, in this case to carry on with your weight loss, just take your journey to the cupboard.

The bum

This one we will call the Beyonce. It is best to be performed to Sean Paul’s 'Get Busy'

“Shake that thing miss Kana Kana

Shake that thing miss Annabella

Shake that thing yan Donna Donna

Jodi and Rebecca”

Put both arms out in the oooo come here and give us a hug position, and start to shake. Shake the boobs, shake the bum, shake the head, arms and legs, just shake shake shake, if your brother walks in and calls you a knob, ignore him. Infact scrap that. Tell him that jealousy gets you nowhere in life, and he will always have a bum like a cheeky girl. Nonexistent.

Whether or not this gives you the perfect bum, who wants one of those anyway? Ok we all do. But I am telling you now, this dance will give you that sexy Beyonce feeling, one which you can take to the dance floor next time you’re out.

Never strain. Always refrain from anything strenuous and enjoy life. I call these my words of erm wisdom, or okay not wisdom but yano, having a good time without the worry.

So for anymore tips or advice just tweet me @girlinoddshoes always happy to help.